Tuesday, 7 July 2015

I Was Adding So Much Stress

Starting Saturday, the only rule I had put on myself was "Start getting ready for bed at 10 and be trying to sleep by 11 every night." Now I still had to go to work, I had a D&D session to participate in, and I had laundry to do Monday, but in the realm of rules/habits that was the only thing. I did manage to stick to it these past 3 nights and this morning was my first day at work since.

Usually I'd get up with my alarm, feed the cats, crawl back into bed for a half hour and then hurry to dress and get to the bus that would get me to work exactly on time.

Because I'd been getting 7 or 8 hours of sleep instead of 5 or 6, I mananaged to get out of bed when my alarm went off. I got up, fed the cats and cleaned their litter(don't usualy bother to check the box in the morning), got dressed, had half a second of "I don't have to leave yet? huh, I'm kinda bored." before brushing my teeth, putting up my hair, and then poking around on my phone for 20 min.

Imagine that, bored on a workday morning. Thinking back I can recognise the stress under the haze of exhaustion. I'm glad I'm starting to be nicer to myself. I deserve the same level of care and compassion I give my loved ones.

I'm going to be working on figuring out my goals and breaking it all down in to baby steps. If there's anything I've learned by injuring my knee is that it'll take 'forever' to do it the safe and healthy way... but if I go slowly, I'll get where I want to be instead of making things worse.

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